A World Without Heroes

When I was younger, I had this fixation on Heroes.
Of Super Heroes - I like many of them but Batman, the Dark Knight and Caped Crusader was my personal favorite. The reason is because Batman is the only Super Hero without a Super Power. He had only his intellect and will power to win the day.

Of military Heroes - Audie Murphy, the most decorated man in the history of the United States; Alvin York, the Christian who didn't want to go to war, but became the most decorated man of WWI. General Robert E. Lee, a man who worked military miracles against all odds.
But I would be amiss if I didn't include some of the people in our churches; men who went to Europe or the Pacific in the 1940's and saved the world.
Men who went to Korea, engaged the Chinese Communists and kept South Korea free.
Men who went to Vietnam, doing all their country asked; only to be vilified by draft dodging hippies who went to Canada or College.
Men who served in relative peace around the world, standing eyeball to eyeball with the communists; ultimately winning the Cold War.
Men who, after their service, came home and built a life, a family and a home; keeping the country on the right path by just being good citizens and good Christians.
Yes, these people are real American Heroes.

In the 1980's, there was a men's cologne called 'Hero;' it was and is my personal favorite although production ceased years ago. But Hero cologne did have one thing going for it - it had the best commercial of any cologne or aftershave I have ever seen.
Firemen rescuing dogs from a blaze. Policemen getting the bad guy. These men on the screen made you feel good about the true heroes in our society. Though it didn't do much for sales, it was impressive.

But tonight, in this hour, I don't need a hero; I need a miracle.

You see, cancer is not only a life-stealer, it is a joy-stealer and a hope-stealer. It is a natural depressant to a Christian's spiritual life.
As it spreads or is discovered in more areas of your body than what was first known, the more joy and hope is taken away from you. Such is my case.
And it has become abundantly clear to me - the only way I am going to walk away from this disease is if God touches my life and heals my body with His power.

Doctors are good; they've been given to us as a resource by God's grace and we should use them. But doctors and their knowledge can only go so far.
Nutrition and the knowledge of prevention is truly a gift; we understand so much more now than ever before. But again - it is only going to take us so far.
Modern drugs, modern medicine in general - should be used to their utmost advantage - but they will sometimes fail.
The one thing that never fails is the power of God Himself; more than any other time in my life, I need God to expose His grace and demonstrate His power through my life.
I cannot fathom survival happening any other way.
Not for me. Not with cancer. Not to the degree at which this battle must be fought.

It may sound like a worn out cliche but it is true - it's all in the hands of God now.

And maybe that is one of our problems in this life - not allowing all aspects of our hearts and lives to be in His hands at all times.
Maybe that's why we suffer so much and fail so often.
If God never fails and we often do, then maybe we're not walking as we should be walking. Maybe we're not giving over to Him what He desires. Maybe our spirits aren't in line with His Spirit and our free will isn't in tune with His Sovereign will.

Someone several weeks ago said that I was 'a miracle in the making.' If they are right, which I hope that they are, I certainly pray that God begins to show the steps in that miracle fairly soon. The roller coaster of emotions is affecting my hope and destroying my joy.
This isn't an issue of faith; my faith is solid.
It's an issue of being broken and wanting to be fixed.

In Matthew 9 there are several miracles recorded that Christ performed. In some of them, He heals according to the person's faith. In others, the person healed had no faith whatsoever, nor did anyone else; He just healed them.
In one He forgives sins, another He heals the a woman as she touches Him in a crowd, in  yet another Jesus heals a blind man by a simple touch of the eyes.

All this teaches us a couple of things about God's healing power.
First of all - God still heals; I'm sort of old fashioned in believing in the all-powerful Most High God and that includes miracles.

Secondly, in every case, each person healed was at the end of their proverbial rope. One man restricted to a pallet; two were blind; a woman was bleeding for over a decade and one young girl was dead.
In each case, they had nowhere to turn; except to Jesus.
Friend, that is exactly where I am at in this hour - I have nowhere to go for healing except to God Himself. Yes, the doctors will do what they are trained to do; but in the end, I will be healed and cured by the power of God or I won't be healed at all.
I am at the end of my rope, praying He ties a knot in it and pulls me through.

Thirdly, with each of the people He healed - all of them were to glorify God and reveal to them who He was so that they, and others, would come to Him in saving faith.
If God chooses to heal my body, I know it will not be forgotten and will be greatly spoken of by every person I know and who knows this situation - others will come to Him in saving faith because of what He has done through me.
I have had this happen before - God using me and the ministry He has given me to glorify Himself and bring people to saving faith. Friend, I can honestly say that there is no greater honor than to be used in this manner.
I am praying that He will heal my body and do it one more time.

On this point, I am torn. In one sense I feel selfish because my life will be spared and it will greatly benefit me. But in another sense, I know I won't be spared because of anything I have done, or because I'm a nice guy, or even because I'm a preacher.
If God heals me it will be for His glory and for others to come to Him by faith - I'm OK with this because that's all I want as well.

Through this entire struggle with cancer, I have never been angry. I have been discouraged, I have not understood why it was  happening or how it could happen without any detection for so long; but mostly, I've been disappointed.
Disappointed that my children may not have their father like so many other children do at key points in their lives.
Disappointed for my wife - she has been so solid with this struggle in support and love; but she didn't ask for this, yet she is enduring it with me.
And I've been disappointed that God hasn't shown Himself in the way I expected through this situation as of yet.
But Scripture promises the believer ultimately will not be disappointed in Him and His ways aren't my ways - which is a good thing.

There's one more thing I have learned as we have gone through this situation - in dark times God begins to reveal some things that were not known previously.
He will reveal things about Himself to the one in the situation. He will reveal things about the person to himself. He will reveal things about that person in the dark time to other people.
If the struggle, the trial, the dark time had never come - none of these things would have ever been revealed or known. That's the silver lining in the dark cloud.

In a few days, my adrenal gland will be removed; what happens next is uncertain at this time. As I go into the surgery, I will probably awake to one less gland and minus a spleen - they found 'nodules' in the spleen today and they have to do something with it as well.
Whether these tumors are harboring cancer cells and are malignant  or if they are benign- nobody knows and will not know until they are outside my body and under a microscope.
If the adrenal tumor is cancerous, they have given me little hope. They've given me very little hope anyway, but this would reduce my chances from years to months.

So, for me - I don't need a hero to save the day; I need a miracle by the hand of God.

And if you are in a situation right now and need a miracle - whether with your family, your spouse, your job, your health or your church; you need to do what I'm doing.
That means you have to trust the Living God with all you have within you and if He delivers in your situation as I expect Him to deliver me in mine, when it's over - tell the story and tell it well.

Heroes are appropriately admired; miracles send shock waves of praise throughout the universe while God is to be lifted in an adoration of worship.

Until next time, win one for the good guys.