Spiritual Kryptonite

One year ago I was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer; given about 6 months to live. 
At that meeting at the Cleveland Clinic with compassion-filled doctors, I was told that they would do their best to extend my life, but they couldn't save it.
That moment ranks as one of the most devastating in my entire life.

That was one year ago this week.
In a strange way, I am thankful for that day, the week and the months that followed. Not because of what I endured, but what I learned about myself and about others and about God and suffering during those months.

When I revealed what I was diagnosed with, a friend gave me a wonderful book entitle 'A Bend in the Road.' It was very insightful, for the pastor who wrote it described his own journey with cancer.
More than anything, it gave me a starting point spiritually.
And what I found was that my contemporary Christians and also faithful men and women from decades long past - each tried to offer spiritual strength however they knew best to do it.
I am so thankful and will ever be appreciative for their work and effort toward me and my family.

Today, as I looked through my Rolodex, my 'Friends' list on a social networking site and through our Church Directory - I found an amazing fact.
The fact is that so many people I know, young and old, are suffering from some type of cancer in their lives. And I think what is most amazing is the amount of people with whom I went to Gauley Bridge High are suffering from various types of cancer.
Some of those are reading this blog right now.

Well, as I endured the 'Cancer Fight,' I found a quote from long ago that I have come to appreciate more and more each day:

"Endurance is not just the ability to bear a hard thing, but to turn it into glory."
                                  -- William Barclay

What I have found with most people who suffer is not that they don't appreciate words of encouragement of a spiritual nature; no, many of them do, especially when it shows you truly care.
Rather, it does matter but it doesn't help in the sense of a person writhing in pain from cancer or chemotherapy or radiation when a well-meaning person speaks of God's will and allowing it to 'run its course' in the life of the one who suffers.

I am one of the blessed in the sense that God healed me; there is no doubt about that.
Nobody walks away from a hospital when they have been diagnosed and confirmed as Stage 4 cancer; they are generally carried out under a sheet.
I walked away because God healed me; for some reason I do not know, God made a decision to touch my life and heal my body.
I do know that it was not because I'm a minister because ministers die all the time; heaven is over-flowing with many of them.
I do know it wasn't because I am so special, righteous, or holy because I know there is One who is Holy and that One is not me.
I do not know why God chose to heal me and not somebody else; but that brings me to an amazing piece of thoughtfulness in this hour. 
Something that I have termed, 'Theological Kryptonite.'

In the minds of those who are closest to me, there is no question God made the conscious decision to heal me. It was nothing of me and all of Him - He specifically and mercifully made the decision to heal my body and is continuing to strengthen me as the days pass.
This being true, it would also mean the reverse is true as well.
If God intervenes in a life, He has made the decision to do so. It also means that at every point of human suffering, God has made a decision as whether or not He will intervene.
Therefore, if a person is not miraculously healed as I was healed, God has likewise made the decision not to heal that person.
It doesn't sound fair but it is very true.

This 'problem' is ages long - Why does a good and holy God allow suffering? Why doesn't He stop it?
This is Theological and Spiritual Kryptonite.

But there is a solution; yet, the solution is more about our understanding of the problem rather than our understanding of God.
You see, whether or not God heals a person is not for humans to decided. Honestly, our minds aren't able to comprehend all of who God is nor what He does. 
We are confined to our view from Earth; though we don't understand, we must learn to trust Him by faith that He will always do what is good, right, holy and best for our lives - at all times.

When we suffer, it is not about our suffering.
Our suffering is about our FAITH.

I'll give you an example to explain what I mean.
In the Biblical account of Job, the grand question of Job is 'Why has this happened to me?' Granted, he had suffered immensely; but that isn't the question for the reader.
The question as we read is - 'How will Job respond?'
Will Job trust God? Will he deny God? What is Job going to do now that all has been taken away?

The reader of Job see able to see what is taking place in the supernatural world; we receive a glimpse of the heavenly court and know why Job is enduring what he is enduring.
Therefore, we don't ask 'why?'
Rather, we will ask 'How will he respond?' and 'To what end is he suffering?'

Like Job, when we suffer we often put God on trial.
We question His goodness, we wonder about His fairness. Some will even get to the point where they wonder if there is a God at all. 
And some, including Job, will get extremely close to blasphemy. We become men and women very close to the edge.

The reason Job or any of the suffering saints' words ring familiar with us is because we often have the very same, deeply felt complaints with God.
Whether it is Job or the Church Father Augustine or even a Pastor from the Victorian Era like Charles Spurgeon - when they speak of their misunderstanding about God, their confusion, their pain - these words hit a nerve because they voice what we think and dare not say.

The purpose of suffering and pain or even with cancer and dying is not 'where is God when I am hurting?'
God is there, we just need a better set of eyes to see Him.
No, the question isn't where is God. The question is where you and I are when we are hurting, when we are suffering, when we are dying?
How do we respond when we are given our piece of 'Spiritual Kryptonite?'
How do we continue to live faithfully when we know we are going to die?

The truth is how we respond speaks volumes about who you are as a person.
So, if you are suffering today or even dying - I know what you're feeling because I was taken to the edge and brought back. I cannot promise you the same results as I have received; though I pray you experience what I have experienced.
I want you to remember, whether suffering from watching a loved-one suffer or feeling the pain yourself, how you respond to what is taking place can either glorify God or invoke sympathy for yourself.
How you deal with what you are dealing with will remain in the minds of those you love far more than anything else. 
Stay strong, keep the faith and may God bless you.

Until next time, try to win one for the good guys.